As a public service to my friends going to Isla Mujeres who may find themselves faced with this dilema, here are some ideas on what a person can tell their children in order to prevent young impressionable minds from becoming damaged due to the inevitable public exhibition of naked female breasts on Playa Norte.

• It's rude to stare.
• If you look at them it will make you go blind.
• Those women are all going to hell, and you will too if you watch them.
• Santa makes his list here too.
• You'll turn to stone if you stare at those women.

And, of course, my personal favorite:

• You'll put your eye out with those things.

Please be safe, enjoy the beach, and try not to stare!!!